In Between Days

i.

I fall from the sky
without deliberation,
plunge like a hawk with wings clipped.

Assisted suicide has its benefits
when love dissolves
into everlasting slumber
afraid to wake up,
and face the day.

I feel` grey like billowy clouds
after a storm
clogging my senses
       so I cannot breathe.

ii.



I live in limbo
a place where nothing is tangible,
anxiety escaping steel ribs
like smoke from a cigarette -
toxic, manufactured to kill.

Your love is elusive
one minute pure, plentiful
giving opulent impressions
that this time,
this time you’ll stay.

Then like the wandering wind
you slip though cracks in the floorboard
stealing my heart
leaving a stone in its place.

I slip on ice.
smack my head on cold pavement.

All I see is white.

iii.

This in between place:
it preys on insecurity
descends into madness
leaving me in a state of vertigo.

I spin around the sun,
outrun the moon
your love illusory
as I swirl out of control
a meteor creating disaster.

Release me from your grip,
please...
Allow me to press on.
even as Hell descends onto me;
jackals nipping at my heels.